Generosity without expectation for reward is intrensically rewarding
Practicing generosity may help us learn what it feels like to let go. We are literally letting go when we give someone a gift. This is why generosity preceeds meditation within Buddhist trianing because it feels good and open; it is a joyful state, or in other words, it is expanded consciousness. Yet not all generosity is equal. What happens when we give a gift and expect something in return? A passage in the Pali Canon may give us a clue: âThe donor, before giving, is glad; while giving, their mind is inspired; and after giving, is gratified.â From the perspective of operant conditioning, the donor is glad (trigger); while giving, their mind is inspired (behavior); and after giving, they feel gratified (reward). In particular, this lack of recognition can explain the burnout experienced by those who constantly help others but return home exhausted, feeling unappreciatedâlike modern martyrs.
On the other hand, if we selflessly do a good deed, what would we expect? Absolutely nothing. Because we werenât looking for a reward. It wouldnât matter whether the reciever thanked us or not. Yet the deed would still feel good, because the act provides an intrinsic reward. Giving feels good, especially when untainted by an expectation of recognition on the back endâno strings attached. That condition may be what the passage in the Pali Canon is pointing to. When we selflessly give, we donât have to worry about buyerâs remorse because we arenât buying anything. This intrinsic reward leaves us feeling gratified and lays down a memory that prompts us to do the same thing the next time.
References
- Brewer, Judson. (2017). The Craving Mind Chapter 8. Learning to Be Meanâand Nice (Location 2286). New Haven, CT: Yale University Press.
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Type:đ´ Tags: Psychology / Philosophy / Ethics Status:âď¸