Directive-domineering parenting
- Borderline Personality Disorder
- Directive domineering ruling
The directive-domineering style of parenting arose gradually with the rise of agriculture and reached its zenith during feudal and early industrial times. Unquestioned obedience to lords and masters during this time often meant the difference between life and death, so the goal of parenting shifted from that of creating free and independent people to that of creating subservient beings. Rather than foster the child’s will, directive-domineering parents attempted to quash that will and replace it with a willingness to abide by the wills of others. Physical beatings were a regular and widely approved means of suppressing the will.
In recent times, at least in some homes, psychological beatings have replaced physical beatings as the primary means of directive-domineering parenting. Regular inductions of guilt or shame, or threats of abandonment or withdrawal of love, can be even more powerful than the rod or whip in beating children into submission. But whatever its means, the goal of the directive-domineering parent is to turn the child into a servant. Yet history tells us that directive-domineering parenting has never been fully effective. Freedom is so strong a drive that it can never be fully beaten out of a person, regardless of age. Even in the humblest servant or the meekest child, free will continues to bubble below the surface, ready to boil over when the lid is loosened. That is why societies in which the masses are controlled by the few are never stable. In the long run, the directive-domineering style works no better in homes than it does in nations.
References
- Gray, Peter. (2013). Free to Learn Chapter 10. TRUSTFUL PARENTING IN OUR MODERN WORLD (p. 295). New York, NY: Basic Books.
Metadata
Type:🔴 Tags: Developmental Psychology Status:⛅️